Day 14: When God Seems Distant

God is always around. Sometimes I can't feel Him. In my heart, I know He's there, but I just can't feel Him. I'm hurting and I'm wondering why I'm all alone, why do I have to suffer this way? Why did He pick last night to leave me alone with my anxiety? All relationships have periods of separation. How we behave during the separation says a lot about our commitment to it.

I know a girl who is a track star. Literally. And anyone who runs knows that it's a relationship. It requires time and commitment. My friend runs for her high school track team, and even though it's summer, she's still running. No one who knows her questions her commitment to running. If she took the summer off, she would still probably be the fastest girl in her school. But she want's to be the fastest girl in the state. She has the drive and skill to do it too. Good Luck this year, I hope I get to see you compete.

Is my commitment to God as dedicated? There is no "off season" for true Christians. Nope, even when God is choosing to seem distant from me, I need to worship Him. The Book of Job, one of my favorite in the Bible, was perfect meat for this chapter. I know the story well, and have used parts of it several times to help lift up friends who were down. Job lost everything and I mean EVERYTHING. He railed against God, openly and honestly, but he never once stopped trusting Him. He knew his place, and he even foreshadowed our Savior.

If only there were someone to arbitrate between us,
to lay his hand upon us both,
someone to remove God's rod from me,
so that his terror would frighten me no more
Job 9:33-34 (NIV)

If I lost everything in a day as Job did, I would surely rail against God, I would curse the day I was born, the day my mother kissed my father, but could I bring myself to say: "Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him" Job 13:15a (NIV) "God is killing me, but I trust Him." I surely hope so. Can I continue to love, trust, obey, and WORSHIP Him when all around me is falling apart?

Last night was a test, and in it, His promise from 1 Corinthians 10:13 held true, He gave me a way out, and a way to endure. Thank you Chels, I slept well last night after reading your words. But I still need to work on "telling God exactly how I feel".

I'm non confrontational by nurture. Not by nature, my genetic make up would lead anyone to believe that confrontation is in my DNA. I've said it before, Cuban mother . . . Italian father a formula for being aggressive and confrontational if I dare say so myself. But my house was full of confrontations and nothing good ever came of them. So that is why I say 'by nurture' I am non confrontational. I do however tend to be passively aggressive. I'm working on it.

Besides, who am I to tell God anything? First off, why do I need to say it if He's omnipotent? Secondly, who am I that He would even care? Obviously He knows how I'm feeling if He allowed these things to happen right? I am dust compared to Him. Those kinds of thought patterns make it very hard to open up and say how I'm feeling. Those kinds of thought patterns come from listening to the great deceiver. Satan wants me to believe that I am nothing to God, that God doesn't care. He woos me with lies. He tells me I don't need to tell God, I need to tell him what's wrong, he'll make me feel better. Satan has all kinds of comforts ready for me the second things start to get hard. The Bible says of him: 'he stalks me like a lion waiting to pounce'.

I love my wife and she knows it; it's seen in almost everything I do. But I still need to tell her. The words have power. Crying out to God, telling Him everything that He already knows, begging for His Strength, His Mercy, or His Forgiveness is a powerful act of worship. Telling God I'm mad at Him, isn't anti-Christ like. Do these words sound anti-Christ? "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" Tell God how you feel, He can take it.

The other things I can do is focus on who God truly is. Remember, I worship the God who IS, not the God I want Him to be. I know from reading that God is constant, He keeps His promises, and He loves me and wants what is best for me. Even if, as in during moments like last night, it seems like He has left me alone again. God will do what He has to do to keep me. That includes seeing if I can remember who He is and what He has already done for me.

A lot of people quote Romans 5:8 as a testament of how much God loves us and deserves our worship. ". . . while we were still sinners, Christ died for us". If you know me on Facebook, I have a different quote on my profile. I've personalized internally and my version has 'my' and 'me' in place of 'our' and 'us'. It was probably the first verse I can remember remembering.

But HE was pierced for MY transgressions,
HE was crushed for MY iniquities;
the punishment that brought ME peace was upon HIM,
and by HIS wounds I am healed. Is 53:5

That's how much He loves me and that is why I worship Him.

Today's Bible Quote is from the Book of Hebrews.

For God has said, 'I will never leave you, I will never abandon you.'
Heb 13:5 (TEV)

There's a HUGE promise in that. And the God who IS never breaks His promise.

Today's question: How can I stay focused on God's presence especially when He feels distant? I do this by reading His Word and listening to music that makes me feel closer to Him.

Remember:God is real no matter how I feel.

Day 13: Worship that Pleases God

Sorry to keep you waiting. I've had a long day, I had to get up early and leave for work at 11, after getting home at 3am. Now we just finished bringing a piano home. I am beat. Honestly, I wanted to sit down and play video games for a while before blogging, but this is my choice. A willful decision to put God before anything I want.

Today's chapter is about how I can please God through my worship. This is about how I worship. Not as in what method I use to worship Him, but what is my motive. Am I worshiping with all my heart, mind, soul, and strength? God wants me to worship Him as He revealed Himself to us in the Bible. We cannot just create our own comfortable, or politically correct image of God and worship it. That's idolatry. Am I worshiping the God I want, or the God who IS?

God also looks at my heart when I worship, not my words. If I am being genuine in my heart, God won't care if I am sitting, kneeling, prone, or standing with my arms outstretched. That was hard for me, I was raised Catholic and prayer was worship and it was ritualistic. I've since learned that many things are worship, and just recently that everything I do can be an act of worship.

God wants my worship to be thoughtful. For years growing up, after confession I was told to say X number of "Our Father"s and X number of "Hail Mary"s and my sins would be forgiven. I can remember times I spent going bead by bead around my Rosary, each bead had one of those prayers assigned to it. It was repetitious, boring, and it wasn't worship. My worship these days is more specific, even if I do still use the Our Father as my basic prayer.

But prayer is only a small part of my worship to God. Practical worship pleases God. It involves sacrifice. Practical is worship is many different things. (thanksgiving, praise, humility, repentance, offerings of money, prayer, serving others, and sharing with those in need.) Again, it's not doing these things to draw attention to myself, it's to draw attention to God. That is what took me a few days to figure out with the blog. I thought that the more people reading and commenting made this form of worship better. But,I cannot exalt God and myself at the same time.

I tried the exercises in this chapter, it wasn't easy. Praising God without using the same old words, that was a challenge. Being specific was a little bit easier because I've been learning to pay more attention to Him in my everyday world. I even looked up the Matt Redman song Heart of Worship. I truly desire my life to be a living sacrifice, I used to not know what that meant, even though I've said it, and sang it. I'm starting to understand it better now.

The Bible verse is from the Gospel of Mark:

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.
Mark 12:30 (NIV)

Today's question is this: Which is more pleasing to God right now- my public worship, or my private worship? What will I do about this? Wow, that's a hard one to answer, because I think in my public worship, it's obvious to the people around me how much I love God. I think it is anyway. My public worship is honest, and heartfelt. This blog is both a form of public and private worship, and I'm hopeful that it is pleasing to God. So I guess the answer is that my public worship is more pleasing than my private worship. I need to spend more time worshiping God in ways that are not as obvious to everyone else. I need to raise my family as a form of worship, work as a form of worship, and reflect more on His word.

Remember:God wants all of me.

Day 12: Developing Your Friendship with God

I've got a lot of friends. I'm a nice guy and I'm good at making friends. Just look at my facebook page, over 240 "friends". They consist of Family, Co-workers, People from high school, etc. At one point, I had close to 500 from playing online games. And those 240 aren't even all my friends. My Best friend I mentioned from Brooklyn doesn't have a facebook. There's someone else who sent me a friend request a few years ago too. (Actually, He wanted to be my friend 38 years ago, when he started writing out my story)

Remember my friend from NY who I don't keep in constant contact with. I still consider us close, and he probably does too. But we're not really, in our heads we both know it, but 33 years is a long time. I think we both just made life more important than keeping in touch. We're as close as we feel comfortable being. The same is true with me and God. He's as close as I'll let Him be. Sometimes that closeness is like my own skin, other times it's like my friend in NY. But God never moves away from me, I move.

Back to my 240 facebook friends. Sorry if you're reading this and just learning it for the first time, but you don't really know all about me. I've been keeping things from you. Of course some of you do know me, my wife knows me better than I know myself, plus I have a few 'bet freds' that know a lot of personal things about me. But even my wife doesn't know every sin, only God and I know. And God wants me to admit that they are sins and change. I can't lie to God, He demands and deserves complete honesty. That's the kind of friend He wants to be. Your best friend knows you're not perfect and doesn't expect you to be, but they do expect you to be honest with them.

I don't harbor any resentment towards God any more. I used to, until I met a young man going through something that I had gone through. He confided and trusted in me, because I was able to share my story with him. That day, I looked back at my life and went 'Whoa!' You remember the chess analogy from day five right? I wouldn't have been able to help that young man if I wasn't from a broken home and hadn't experienced something similar to what he went through. I wouldn't have been able to keep him from blaming God for what happened! God will use everything in my life for His Glory! And I'm ok with that. . . Now.

I trust Teresa, I trust my Pastors, I trust my "Toms". But, I still question some of the things they ask me to do. (like lead a Mens Group)I think it goes back to knowing myself in a way they don't and thinking 'I can't do what you're asking me to do.' With God, to say that would be to call Him a liar. Because if God say I need you to do this, and I love Him, I'll do it without question. If He says go take that Missionary Trip to Zimbabwe, I guess I'm going to Africa. Somehow. He'll see that it happens.

But, He really wants to see me do the little things daily. Those are things that bring Him pleasure. When I open doors, act in kindness, lift people up who are down, God smiles and says "that's my friend John right there." He tells the angels, "Did you see what John did today? No, not that, I paid for that already. Today he talked to a complete stranger about me. Today he gave up his seat on a bus for an older lady. Today he wrote a blog about how much I mean to him." Tomorrow I may stumble, but today I made God smile. How about you?

God is my Best Friend, but I am not His equal. He sent the Holy Spirit to be with me always. And I'm not perfect, and I still sin, I lust, I covet, I curse, etc. But I'm open and honest about it with God, I pray for His forgiveness when I loose my temper or let my mind wander away from good things. I care about the things God cares about, I care about you.

There is nothing -absolutely nothing- more important than developing a friendship with God.
If you don't have the book, I want you to have this prayer:

Dear Jesus, More than anything else, I want to get to know you intimately.

Say that prayer repeatedly. Mean it with all your heart, and He will make it happen.

Our Bible Verse comes from the Book of James. James was Jesus' half brother. He grew up with Jesus as his big brother. He knows about being His friend.

Come close to God, and God will come close to you
James 4:8a (NLT)

The Question really made me think about what I have been doing and where I can improve:
What practical choices will I make today in order to grow closer to God? I've chosen to pray more, and I'm making a conscious effort to swear less. Foul language doesn't add anything to what I am saying anyway.

Remember: I'm as close to God as I choose to be.

Day 11: Becoming Best Friends with God

I have a friend in New York City. We met when we were four years old. He's less than a month older than me and has a brother that is the same age as my sister. We grew up on the same block in Brooklyn. We were best friends all the way up till 4th grade. Then I moved away with my mom and only saw him in the summer. I may have written or called him a few times from Miami, but obviously I didn't see him often. We each made new friends through middle school and high school. But, my 10th grade year, I moved back to Brooklyn.

We would be going to the same school again. What I found out was that we were still best friends. He made sure I was welcomed and accepted and not picked on cause I talked funny to all those Brooklyn Kids. "This is Florida John." He would introduce me to his friends and they would consider me their friend by association. To this day, he's still my best friend on earth. I don't call him as much as I should, and we never get to spend time together, but if I needed him, he would be there for me and I would be there for him. We're guys and not talking doesn't impact our friendship.

But, I have another Best Friend. God wants to be my best friend. That He wants to have that kind of relationship with me is one I had never considered growing up. God wants me to love and worship Him sure, but that the Almighty God wants to hear about my day and chat with me is hard to grasp. I am nothing compared to Him, dust beyond notice. But the Bible tells us He knows me intimately. He wants me to know Him too. He's already shown me how much He loves me, He's just waiting for me to show Him that I love Him in return. Knowing and loving God is our greatest privilege, and being known and loved is God's greatest pleasure. I make God's day when I spend time with Him.

We become friends with someone through conversation. We become best friends with God through constant conversation. I already said that I'm not good at just 'talking' to God. Maybe it was growing up in New York seeing crazy people walking around talking to themselves, maybe it was the ritualistic Catholic upbringing. Church is where God is and we pray to Him there. (And from the foot of our beds) No place is any closer to God than the place where you are right now. God is right here, right now.

But this doesn't tell me just to Pray to God. Conversation is talking, God wants to chat. He doesn't want me to just give Him a spot on my daily planner, He wants to be involved in everything I do. Every choice I make should start with the question: 'What do you think God?' And I should respect what He says. Now I know that He's not going to answer me in an obvious manner. There will be no neon sign above the right road to take, no mysterious highlighter that only I can see underlining the correct answer. But God will always answer, even if it's with silence. Silence from God means He wants to see if I've been paying attention.

We become friends with someone by learning more about them. What's your name? Where are you from? What do you do for a living? God's short answer to that is 'I AM'. When Moses asked God who he should tell Pharaoh and the Israelites sent him to lead them. God answered 'I am who I am . This is what you are to say to the Israelites: 'I AM has sent me to you.'(Exodus 3:14) But, that was in a two way conversation with Moses, God was speaking directly to him. I don't see a lot of burning bushes these days that aren't being consumed by the flames. So, how can I know more about God?

We learn more about God through continual meditation. I have His story, all 66 books of it. I can read it from cover to cover and know everything I need to know about God. And the more I read and think on it, the more I'll know Him. He gave us this great gift that we would have to seek Him out.

You can't love God unless you know Him, and you can't know Him without knowing his Word. I need to expand my knowledge of God's Word. I know the big events, the stories everyone learns, But what do I know about Obadiah, or what happened in the Book of Malachi? All of the stories make up who God is. And thinking about them will bring me closer to knowing God and becoming His best friend.

I love the line: If you know how to worry, you know how to meditate. Just by thinking about the stories I do know I can learn more about God. If I add to them, I'll know Him even better. I think that's a great purpose to have. I will work on putting God's Word above all else. In Psalm 119 Verse 11 David tells God "I have hidden your Word in my heart, that I might not sin against you." David was considered a friend of God!

Friendship with God is reserved for those who reverence Him.
Psalm 25:14 (LB)

It's no surprise that the last three verses have come from the Book of Psalms. Like I have said, David was the wisest man ever, and he was a friend of God.

The question today is: What can I do to remind myself to think about God and talk to Him more often during the day? I've been working on this already, I bring my Bible to work. I talk to Him on my ride to and from work, and this book sure is helping. I think I might try the hourly prayer tonight. Every hour I will just take five minutes to pray. And while I'm working, I will talk to God.

Remember: God wants to be my best friend.

Day 10: Heart of Worship

Once again, I wanted to put up my post last night after work, but I couldn't. The problem with getting home at 3am is that when the devil gets in your head and makes it hard to concentrate all you can do is pray. There's no one I would call at that time of night, the house is asleep and I don't want to wake anyone up. This has nothing to do with the book, but lately I've been having weird feelings riding home at night. It's a bunch of long dark roads and I been worried about people following me for some reason. I guess I might feel better if I took the highway, when was the last time Freddy or Jason jumped out of the median at somebody, but dark, wooded roads; those are prime boogie-man locations. And if that weren't bad enough there's the tiny little deer to worry about too. But anyway. . .

"I give up" . . . "uncle" . . . "you win"
That's how I think of surrender. I was in the military, surrender is taught to be a last resort. I don't surrender well. Let's face it, there are things we have to surrender to every day. Some times it has a nice name like when you "compromise" with your spouse. Inside it still feels like surrender. (to both of you) You can't compromise with God, you have to surrender. But surrendering to God is the heart of worship.

I'm not at war with God, we're not wrestling or playing a game, I'm in love with Him. So why is surrendering so hard? It's hard for the same reason it's hard with my wife, for the same reasons they talked about in the military. I'm afraid of what is going to happen. At this stage in my life, it's not that I don't trust God, it's just that I still think I can figure this stuff out on my own.

A funny thing this reminds me of from the Bible is a story of Abraham. God told Abraham to take his wife and go to another country. Abraham thought, 'if these people know she is my wife, they will kill me and take her for themselves. I know, (burning torch over his head because they didn't have lightbulbs) I'll tell them she's my sister.' So his 'sister' gets added to the king's harem . . . bad things happen, and God has to intervene. Abraham talked to God!!! And he still had trust issues. I can't imagine talking to God, or even an Angel of the Lord, like they describe in the Old Testament.

I can do anything I set my mind to . . . I don't need anyone's help . . . I got this.
Lies! I can do NOTHING without God. I know this, in my heart I've accepted it as Truth, but I still deal with pride and ego issues. Surrendering is admitting that I have limitations. Let's face it, that's a big ego kill. Well, I have all kinds of limitations, but none that I want to admit publicly. Ok, I'll give you one, I can't do a wheelie on my motorcycle. I know all the mechanics, the physics behind it, I've seen it done on my bike so I know it's possible, but I can't do it. There, I said it; now no one will ask me, or expect me to do one.

Admitting our limitations can be a big relief. We are not God and 'never' will be. As much as I physically look like Jesus, no one expects me to walk on water, although I have been asked to turn water into wine. People don't usually ask you to do stuff if they already know you can't do. When was the last time you were asked to move a grand piano by yourself? Having to admit I can't do something usually upsets me. I really related to what the author said about reacting with anger and resentment. But I want to say, if you can do a wheelie, I don't hate you, I'm not mad at you, I'm just bummed that I can know how to do something, but not be able to do it.

But I have to look at it the way the author describes it. Surrendering is not for cowards or doormats. When I admitted my faith, some of my friends rode me pretty hard, some of my 'friends' even scattered, but some of them have come forward to say "'I'm a Christian too." People that I didn't know were Christians are now with me on this journey. It's sad that I didn't know beforehand that they were Christians, but admitting my faith to the public was my first act of surrender. It took guts. Cowards don't do stuff that require guts. Surrendering to God will shake up your life, your household, and your facebook friends list. Trust me, I know it personally. But it was the best thing I ever did.

Now to 'completely' surrender. Completely, there's that finite word again. EVERY aspect of my life has to be surrendered. But, the plus side: Surrendered to God, you don't have to fear or surrender to anything else. Wouldn't that be AWESOME!!!!? No more fear. The apostle Paul said, "to live is Christ, to die is gain." He was in prison for talking about God and threats against his life didn't even scare him. I can't fulfill God's purpose in my life unless I surrender to Him and not my own fear based plans, that's a path to chaos. Nothing under His control is ever out of control.

The problem with a living sacrifice is that it can crawl off the altar, so you may have to resurrender your life fifty times a day. I'm human, I fall off the wagon. The thing about it is I gotta get back up. Maybe you've been there. Maybe you fell off and thought, "that hurt, it's better to stay off the wagon than fall again." Get back up. God loves the underdog. (That's us) Luke tells us in his Gospel that Jesus said "I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent." I can't make the text red here, but JESUS SAID THAT!!! God and all the angels rejoice when we repent. And you know what, each time I've gotten back up, the next fall wasn't as far and didn't hurt as bad.

When I fall again today, I'll get back up and continue on. See, God doesn't make me 'start over' when I fall. My life is full of "checkpoints" and if you play video games like I do, you know it's all about reaching the next checkpoint. Once you reach a checkpoint you don't have to start from the beginning again. I don't have to be re-baptized, or re-affirm my faith to others. All I have to do is admit that what I did was wrong,(to God and to myself) really try not to do it again, and continue from where I left off. So if you're down right now, I want you to know that Jesus has his hand out ready to help you back up. Right where you left off!

Our Bible verse comes from the Book of Romans. The book quotes Today's English Version, but I like the way it reads in the New International Version better. You get a fuller picture.

Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness.
Rom 6:13 (NIV)

The question is one that I didn't want to answer:
What area of my life am I holding back from God? My finances. I still think I can figure them out myself. But, I talked with my wife last night and we're going to sit down together and have a really uncomfortable (at least from my end) conversation.

Remember: The heart of worship is surrender.

Day 9: What Makes God Smile

I almost didn't sit down to write this before work. I did a lot of stuff around the house yesterday and when I woke up this morning I felt like goofing off. It took me a while to wake up, like I said, the apnea doesn't help me sleep well. But as I sat here sorting laundry and washing a load of jeans, I realized two things. First, I hate sorting socks. I'm going to invent affordable disposable socks. People buy all kinds of disposable things, we have plates, forks, paper towels etc, that never need washing. We should have disposable socks. Second, any distraction that keeps me from reading my book and blogging is from the devil. Not that sorting socks and washing jeans didn't need to be done, but I made a promise to put this book and blog first. It's helping me do all the stuff that needs to be done for the right reasons and with the right heart. Besides I had an 90 minutes with my PS3 last night. (The first time since last Sunday) So, on to the text.

The smile of God is the goal of your life.
I'm a parent and a son and nothing makes me happy like when my kids do something that makes me smile. And nothing made me happier as a kid as when my parents were pleased with me and smiling. I can still remember my boot camp graduation and how my parents were both so proud of me. But as a child of God, am I making Him smile? Sometimes I can feel it, sometimes I can even discern His smile in the things around me. When God is pleased with me it is a feeling I can't describe.

God smiles when we love Him 'supremely', trust Him 'completely', and obey Him 'wholeheartedly'.
The author touches on these things separately, but I want to group them together. Those three words are finite. I know you may be thinking that they are infinite, but the reality is that they leave no margin for error. There is no tolerance in them. I work on airplanes and there are tolerances built into every test I run. For example, 150 +/- 5 knots may be a good airspeed test result. So, 145Kts to 155kts is considered 'passing'. When houses are built, the distance between support beams even has a tolerance of a few inches. These words however leave no wiggle room.

Supremely means above ALL else, if there is one thing you love more than God, you're not making Him smile. Completely means with ALL your mind. I used to take drama classes and some of you may be familiar with the "trust" exercise. You stand with your back to someone, look straight ahead, and fall back. If you don't trust the person behind you to catch you, you'll turn your head, or put your arms out in case they drop you. God will never drop you if you trust Him completely. Wholeheartedly, that word is self explanatory. With your WHOLE heart. I put off stuff all the time. I have a list a mile long of things I need to do. But some things can't wait and when they come up there is no pause. Doing things when and how you are asked is obeying wholeheartedly.

God smiles when we praise and thank Him continuously.
I think of how my ego is boosted when my wife tells the world on Facebook what an awesome husband I am. Even if all I did was fold some laundry that was in the spot I wanted to sit. It feels good when she thanks me and other people say nice things about what I did. (shhhh. don't tell them I only did it so I could sit in the comfy spot.) At church on Sunday, the main sound tech kept telling me what a good job I was doing on the sound board, I could see his smile and tell he was being honest. Man that felt good. What reason could I possibly have for not wanting to make God feel that way? NONE. I need to start thanking God for everything, including the things that I don't like. God, thank you for Kimchi, it makes my wife happy.

God smiles when we use our abilities.
The caveat is that I have to use my abilities for good and Godly things. I have an eye for photography. Remember a few days back I mentioned wanting to be published in Time magazine? Remember I also said I used to want to be published in a different magazine? God wouldn't smile if I used the gifts He gave me to cause other people who may struggle with lustful hearts to stumble. Teresa and I thought long and hard when we named our business and came up with our logo. Ethereal Photos: Capturing the Beauty of God's Creations and Sharing them with the World. Ethereal: of or relating to the regions beyond the earth; suggesting the heavens or Heaven.

God looks at the attitude of your heart. Is pleasing Him your deepest desire?
I LOVE that God has forgiven all my sins. But in my heart, I desire to please God and even when I sin, He knows that. He knows I am dust and that I can never be perfect. "All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." My worth to God is only in God, I can do nothing to get into Heaven except Believe that nothing I do will get me into Heaven. Greg said it the other day, Jesus IS the propitiation for all my sins. But the Bible also tells us that Faith without works is death. If I have faith in what Jesus did for me, my life should show others that I love Him supremely, trust Him completely, and obey Him wholeheartedly.

The Bible verse today is from Psalms again.

The Lord is pleased only
with those who worship him
and trust his love.
Ps 147:11 (CEV)

Since God knows what is best, in what areas of my life do I need to trust Him most. Wow, that's a hard one to think on. I obviously need Him in every area of my life, but where I need to trust Him the most I think is with raising my children. Not letting Him raise my children, (wouldn't that make life easier?) but trusting in His ways and teachings for how to be a good parent, a Godly one. I need to stick to the script and remember that when it comes to God's teachings, there is no +/- tolerance.

Remember:God smiles when I trust Him.

Day 8: Planned for God's Pleasure

I don't know about anyone else, but I needed today. I love Sundays. I love being home and love going to Lifecoast Church with my family. I love working the sound board, even when things go wrong. It's an act of worship. And I love that the top of the first page of this chapter says "Purpose # 1". We're getting to the good stuff, the meat and potatoes.

I was planned for God's pleasure. I wasn't placed on this earth for my own pleasure, or for the pleasure of anyone else. I would like to think that I please other people while I am here, but it's not pleasing to God in Heaven if it doesn't bring Him glory. Bringing food to a homeless person, would please the person and God; bringing alcohol to an alcoholic would please the person, but I know it wouldn't please God. So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God— even as I try to please everybody in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved. 1 Cor 10:31-33 (NIV) And doing whatever I want to do usually is pleasant to me in the short term, but the things that don't please God don't bring me as much pleasure as they used to. Like Josh preached today at church, you could say that scales are falling from my eyes. It's not happening overnight, but it is happening.

The last couple of days I have felt impotent. There haven't been comments, I'm starting to wonder if anyone is still with me on this journey. I'm in the arena, and I've got my Armor on, but I'm looking around wondering who has my back. The devil has been finding gaps in my armor and attacking me in my home. I've been looking for God to step in, to intercede on my behalf, and you know what He told me at church today? He said to me "You got this! You can do it on your own, you have to do it." He'll always be there, but if He does this for me, where is the glory?

God wants to see me succeed in this journey. He wants to see me transformed and closer to Him. It would bring him a lot of pleasure. And this is something I CAN do. I was made to please Him. So, I've cast off my need for comments on my blog to validate it's worth. I've reaffirmed that this blog is not about ME. I'm doing it for me, but not in a selfish way. I'm doing this to bring me closer to Him. This blog is an act of worship, and by definition worship isn't about me or for me.

Bringing pleasure to God is called worship. . .Worship is far more than music.
I like how the author says that there is no such thing as Christian 'music' only Christian lyrics. It's true there are all kinds of songs in the Bible, but nowhere in the Bible will you find a 6000 year old clef, or any sheet music. I listen to all styles of Christian songs. Big Daddy Weave has a country feel, Lecrae is a rap singer. And I like everything in between the two.

Worship is not for your benefit. . .Worship is not 'part' of your life; it 'is' your life.
What does that mean? The Bible is very clear: Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men. (Colossians 3:23 (NIV)) If I work at my job as if God was my employer, it would be an act of worship. If I worked as if God was writing my evals, would they be better or worse? Am I doing my job in a manner that is pleasing to man, or God?

Our Bible verse comes from the Book of Psalms. King David was the wisest man throughout history. He wasn't perfect; he was human, and a sinner. But when God asked David what he wanted from God, David put his kingdom's need before his own desire. He knew his place, he saw himself as Steward of God's people. And His answer so pleased the Lord, that God not only granted David the wisdom that he asked for, God granted him the riches and glory that he didn't ask for. That's what working for God can get you.

For the LORD takes delight in his people;
he crowns the humble with salvation.
Psalm 149:4 (NIV)

What common task could I start doing as if I were doing it directly for Jesus? I could start doing household chores for Jesus. Washing dishes, folding laundry, and taking out the trash.

Remember:I was planned for God's pleasure.