Remember my friend from NY who I don't keep in constant contact with. I still consider us close, and he probably does too. But we're not really, in our heads we both know it, but 33 years is a long time. I think we both just made life more important than keeping in touch. We're as close as we feel comfortable being. The same is true with me and God. He's as close as I'll let Him be. Sometimes that closeness is like my own skin, other times it's like my friend in NY. But God never moves away from me, I move.
Back to my 240 facebook friends. Sorry if you're reading this and just learning it for the first time, but you don't really know all about me. I've been keeping things from you. Of course some of you do know me, my wife knows me better than I know myself, plus I have a few 'bet freds' that know a lot of personal things about me. But even my wife doesn't know every sin, only God and I know. And God wants me to admit that they are sins and change. I can't lie to God, He demands and deserves complete honesty. That's the kind of friend He wants to be. Your best friend knows you're not perfect and doesn't expect you to be, but they do expect you to be honest with them.
I don't harbor any resentment towards God any more. I used to, until I met a young man going through something that I had gone through. He confided and trusted in me, because I was able to share my story with him. That day, I looked back at my life and went 'Whoa!' You remember the chess analogy from day five right? I wouldn't have been able to help that young man if I wasn't from a broken home and hadn't experienced something similar to what he went through. I wouldn't have been able to keep him from blaming God for what happened! God will use everything in my life for His Glory! And I'm ok with that. . . Now.
I trust Teresa, I trust my Pastors, I trust my "Toms". But, I still question some of the things they ask me to do. (like lead a Mens Group)I think it goes back to knowing myself in a way they don't and thinking 'I can't do what you're asking me to do.' With God, to say that would be to call Him a liar. Because if God say I need you to do this, and I love Him, I'll do it without question. If He says go take that Missionary Trip to Zimbabwe, I guess I'm going to Africa. Somehow. He'll see that it happens.
But, He really wants to see me do the little things daily. Those are things that bring Him pleasure. When I open doors, act in kindness, lift people up who are down, God smiles and says "that's my friend John right there." He tells the angels, "Did you see what John did today? No, not that, I paid for that already. Today he talked to a complete stranger about me. Today he gave up his seat on a bus for an older lady. Today he wrote a blog about how much I mean to him." Tomorrow I may stumble, but today I made God smile. How about you?
God is my Best Friend, but I am not His equal. He sent the Holy Spirit to be with me always. And I'm not perfect, and I still sin, I lust, I covet, I curse, etc. But I'm open and honest about it with God, I pray for His forgiveness when I loose my temper or let my mind wander away from good things. I care about the things God cares about, I care about you.
There is nothing -absolutely nothing- more important than developing a friendship with God.
If you don't have the book, I want you to have this prayer:
Dear Jesus, More than anything else, I want to get to know you intimately.Say that prayer repeatedly. Mean it with all your heart, and He will make it happen.
Our Bible Verse comes from the Book of James. James was Jesus' half brother. He grew up with Jesus as his big brother. He knows about being His friend.
Come close to God, and God will come close to you
James 4:8a (NLT)
The Question really made me think about what I have been doing and where I can improve:
What practical choices will I make today in order to grow closer to God? I've chosen to pray more, and I'm making a conscious effort to swear less. Foul language doesn't add anything to what I am saying anyway.
Remember: I'm as close to God as I choose to be.
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